Naive

I actually did say i have no regrets in my planner as a "dying message" or well it might actually become a suicide note.

It's not that i don't have any regrets

I just don't have anything to look forward to anymore.

You see, my life is not really a life. Everything is just temporary. Something that runs within a vicious cycle. I don't have a life. I'm just a temporary side character of others'. When i have "friends" they didn't really care about me. I was the one who cares. When i'm in a group i was never the important one. I was replaceable. Easily. I don't have any achievements. I never did anything worthy. My existence is not really appreciated.

In the end everything just comes and leaves without any trace. Sometimes they even took something. Valuable or not. In the end what i get is just hard times. I really think i won't reach happiness. Ever.

So

Why live?

Is it worth the struggle?

Why am i struggling just to keep suffering?

All these stress, hard times, and everything. For what?

Is there any end?

Can i at least receive a prize?

For everything?

I guess not

So... why bother?