I think I really am lost.

I've been living like a NEET for almost one full year now. I'm not exactly a NEET, I'm in the period where the only thing I do is wait for the next medical doctor competency exam and its result, rinse and repeat. In my country, the doctor association thing held the exam 4 times a year. I already failed three of them, well technically two. I failed the qualification for it (yes, a qualification  exam for the exam) from my school once.

So, what am i doing this past three quarters of a year of my life? I'm just a full-time driver for my family, now. My days only consist of driving my brother, sister, and sometimes father around to work, play, or school and then i just hang out at home. I play games or do stuffs until the next exam.

Here's the thing. I don't know if i really care about this or not.

You see. At times, I feel really anxious about it. I wasted years... like... already 7 years on my life studying medical science. I work my ass off through the last 2 years of it being co-assistant, working 50 hours of night-shift a week that my family paid for. Yes, the school requires me to work full-time in the hospital without pay and instead we had to pay for tuition. You see, I'm already like... a year behind everyone. I'm almost 23 and I can't do anything beside housework or driving around or some other useless life skills. My medical school diploma is useless. I can't even be a salaryman or corporate slave with it. So I can't just throw everything away because I lost the will to push myself through. I mean, It's just one last exam to finish this. After this last boss, I'm free of this medical school shit.

But then I started to question everything again and feel down. It's like... so what? What do i gain after finishing medical school? After this I have to do the mandatory "Internship" for a year. After that it's either grinding through a general practitioner job or go back to school for years of slavery to become a specialized doctor. All that while being all lonely without any friend or any prospect of future wife. What's waiting for me out there is an "autopilot" lonely life where it's just mindless endless grind. There's no passion anymore. Everything that I want can easily be dismissed tomorrow. Everything that I'm always so passionate about is just distraction. Anime, games, manga, movie, music, everything.

It always made me think and stopped me from doing anything.

I just float there... lost.

What's the point?

Really.

What's the point in continuing this life?